An Open (Love) Letter

"Search your heart, search your soul. When you find me there, you will..............."

That is what I did, searched my heart. For what, is my heart beating? Rolled back to my path, which I travelled, and it is right from the beginning. I felt somany times, I wanted to be a soul-mate of somebody. But who is the right person? I couldn't find anybody. Now I have a doubt, whether I found somebody or it is just a break-time on the journey.

As I was something differ from others, I tried to keep my personality as its, and still. In school-days, some teachers pointed me as an example of good student. But wasn't me a bad student? Yes, I am. I could advise others on the right track; I kept my thoughts are closed ones and didn't try to reveal with anybody. I am not an open-hearted man.

The first pledge and still I could keep as it is, is the pledge, which I took in front of God. That is, "I will never try/touch the alcohol and smoking." When I was only 11, I took this pledge and could keep the same, even when my father prompted me a lot to try. If I said something, I will do it. I am always truth to my words.

I loved everybody blindly. I hadn't searched any good or bad on them. I tried to deliver my best to them. But, they simply utilized me, which I wasn't understood.

Lots of girls/ladies touched my life. But they haven't touched my heart/soul. When I liked somebody, they would be already engaged. I think, that is happening only because, I am waiting to understand them and finding them are a good match.

One girl, who touched my heart, is still beside me. That was the day, when I came to know, how much I am loving her. But I could see her as my friend and she is my "true-friend". I realized the exact meaning of friendship from her. Soon after, one more came. But I don't know, how long that would be?.........

Finally, I got "you". The similarities with you and me are so matching. But some obstacles still there. I don't know, whether you are loving me or not. But one thing I know, I love you as ..................... (left it for you to fill).

The love is always starting from heart. But most of the case, the first love is inspiring by friends' and community. Now, it is common and they have only one look on a girl and boy, who are living together or travelling together. If both have good views, those who are watching them will change the situations. Because, they are starting to imagine and that is spreading much faster like gas on atmosphere. For example, if you are using a body spray, once you press the button to spray; it produce the gas an will fill the fragrance in the air. Here button is their tounge. When they released the tounge, with words, the news is spreading and all will capturing the "fragrance".

I don't like to reveal, what was cause in my case and what is my strong feel about you. Sometime, one of my friend, who is knowing us ( much better than you) asks, is there anything in between you and me? I replies a smile or a big laugh.

She is my good friend. Everybody was looking keen to us and was waiting anything will happen. But I know, what happened and will go to happen. We take care about ourselves and met secretely.

I haven't belief any kind of future predictions by stars or something else. Recently, I read about me. I will be fall in love with someone, unexpectedly and is hard to believe about that person, who is loving me. I know clearly what will be going to happen in between you and me. What I felt will happen finally. Untill then, let me keep that secret, my dear, dearest.